Programmed by the Media

In recent years, I awoke gradually, to the realization that my thoughts were never my own as long as I fed my mind a daily dose of: television, radio, print, and Internet news for hours non-stop. When would I ever allow for time to simply think for myself—to draw my own conclusions about what I saw and read?

The people who I trusted to be my mentors and teachers were big TV watchers too. They offered me advice based on what they “heard or read somewhere.” I had been a victim of a plan for my life that included lies, pre-conceived notions, stereotypes, ignorance, and religious propaganda from both the good and evil sides. When I looked around at what I thought was my reality, reflected on my past, and envisioned what my future might look like, it was a hard-truth to swallow, that nothing was as it seemed, I like so many others, had been programmed to ignore me.

“Who was I really? How did I get here? Whose idea was it to create nature? What was my purpose? Why is one of the oldest books in the world still the most important—the Bible? Why should I care about the strangers in the media who live and then die? What did it matter that some statistic said one thing or another? Who told me that I had to go to college on money I couldn’t afford to ever pay back? Why is it that only select individuals are allowed to grace the cover of magazines, sell the top records, get the best acting parts and so on, while the rest of us could only wish? Why should I celebrate holidays?”

After all the questions, the tears and the fears, I had finally arrived to adulthood in my thirty-something years. There was no more going along just to get along. No more accepting everything and everyone because someone told me it was the “politically correct” thing to do. I no longer saw a need to act like someone other than myself! It was no longer necessary to join civic groups and religious organizations just to feel like I was doing something to make life better for my children and I! No more pressure to celebrate national holidays and commemorate the deceased year after year. I had broken some of the shackles that had stifled me from being a free-thinking human being. Being an African American, woman, mother, writer and every other title that I had been born into or became, wasn’t as important as it used to be.

I had to learn to acknowledge a Creator that wasn’t outside of me, but the one, some call Jesus, who left a gift that lives inside of me called the Holy Spirit. For years, He had had been whispering to me, since I was child, long before I studied a Bible. When I look back on my life, I know now that it was always in His plan to use me. Some of you are being called while you read this blog entry, here’s your word, “It’s time to put off childish rebellion!” Ask the Holy Spirit to come into your heart and use you. (Read or re-read the Book of Acts and the gospels in the King James or New International Versions to understand some of what I am talking about regarding the Holy Spirit.)

The Holy Spirit wasn’t my mother’s God, my grandmother’s Lord, my friend’s “daddy,” or a cousin’s Allah, He was someone that I had to make up in my mind, body and spirit to embrace. By allowing myself to be subjected to another world, beyond this one, the blinders would slowly come off and years of programming would gradually diminish.
Since 2009, I have looked at our world in a different light. There is no more going along with the TV and radio “programming” any longer. Before that year, I had zero interest in digging for news outside of what was fed to me. It took a simple search for a musician’s name and a short reading of her lyrical content to show me that I had best stop polluting myself with lies.

I am not so trusting anymore about what I see and read. I question everything now more than I had back when I was a journalism student in high school and college. I’m not interested in sharing someone else’s account of things like: religion, health, finances, culture, art, and more like I once was without finding out more and sharing my own personal testimony if necessary. It is more important these days to do your own research and formulate your own opinions even if typical protocol says, “Leave your opinion out of it.” Create your own printed materials, ie.) Nicholl McGuire Media.

Just as there are spirits who help, there are those we allow into our lives that hurt us! One such spirit I would like to call, “lazy.” I, like so many others, have been subjected to this lazy spirit for decades! It tempted me to just get the news from someone else, get your food from someone else, get your housing from someone else, get your counseling from someone else, learn about God from someone else and on and on and on until I grew dependent on someone else! The words that I heard from the media, our government, even relatives I accepted as fact; rather than question them deeply (you know beyond the surface knowledge.) I trusted others that the food they were making was safe for my body. I believed that as long as I had a place to stay, no worries. If a relationship wasn’t what I liked, I reasoned you just get someone else.

The lazy spirit didn’t want me to ponder too long on an uncovered misconception, a lie, or a deceitful practice, it just wanted me to do nothing more than listen and keep your opinions to yourself. The spirit always comforted me with, “It’s okay, don’t worry about it. If you say something, someone might get mad.” Even though I wanted to scream, “It’s not okay! Someone is lying! I need to know the truth.” The lazy spirit distracted me from the truth convincing me that my immature mindset couldn’t handle the truth.

Now that I have reached a place in my life where I see a small light at the end of the tunnel, I must not turn back now, I must keep going toward the light. The last time I saw a light was back in 1992, it was a false flag, I was lying in bed deathly ill at 18 years old from pneumonia and other illnesses. I wanted so bad to walk toward that beautiful light, but a small voice wouldn’t let me. When I awoke that night after sleeping for almost a day, I felt bad, but I knew I had to continue to live, not for me, but for Him, my Lord--he wasn't through with me yet.

A roommate drove me to the emergency room. The doctor said she brought me to the hospital just in time. He told me one wrong move on my part, a shove or a bump to my spleen at the time, and I would have been dead—that’s just how ill I had become, I could barely walk or speak at that time. “You are a very sick young woman,” the doctor said. But God is a healer and I have never been that sick since. When my Lord is ready to take me home, He will. In the meantime, I have things to do and one of them is uncovering lies.

Nicholl McGuire

Spring Break with the Children: A Good Way to Catch a Case of Writer's Block

You would think staying at home with children would actually give you plenty to write about. I mean you could sit back and think about your childhood, laugh about those times when your own children made you smile, and even pen a few tips to help other parents. Yet, the first week the children were out of school, it was nothing more than a playland that at times got out of control leaving someone crying about being hurt. The more energy around me from my four active boys, the more writer's block arose to the surface of my mind. I sat in front of the computer a few times with nothing to say. I think that was a good thing considering the negative emotions swirling within me from having to say far too many times, "Be quiet! Sit down! Stop doing that..." And they say, "The joys of parenting..." Who is "they" anyway?

So finally I took some quiet time just before the oldest boys closed their eyes to go to sleep and I just prayed and cried until every emotion came flooding out! That's right, I sat on the floor and let the tears hit the carpet. It was better I did that then have an anxiety attack. My eldest son came toward me and put his arm around me and when I opened my eyes my other son was crying too. If the little ones had been in the room, they most likely would have been crying as well. It's hard at times, being a mom, especially when you are anal like me about a clean household, organized belongings, and quiet time.

When there are so many emotions flooding within our bodies, we writers need a release that goes beyond love-making, vacations, spas, and shopping--we need the freedom to just exhale with no movement, no touch, and preferably no people. This is one of the best ways to push writer's block away so that the next time we are in front of the computer, we are doing just this, writing.

Nicholl McGuire

Nicholl McGuire Media Editing Services | Academic Editing | Essay Correction | Business Editing |

Oftentimes you can get bogged down trying to keep up with all the tasks that require you to write. You are welcome to stop by my business blog for assistance.  Nicholl McGuire Media

Do You Recall Any of Your New Year's Resolutions?

If you made some or even had a few hopes for this year, how are things coming along?

Since the start of the new year, I have been putting in motion my task list--you know that thing some call, "a goal" or "to do" list. I desired to write and read more (both of which I have been doing, but not without some challenges) and I also needed to abstain from some things personally and professionally that were setting me back including impulse buying.

Sometimes you will find yourself needing more time during the day to do something, so that's when some things must be put aside to allow for other things to happen in your life.

I have found that when we set our goals in front of us each day, great things can happen! There is something about looking at what you have and haven't accomplished each day that will give you a good kick in the rear! I don't know about you, but I just can't keep looking at an unfinished business project on a calendar or on notepads daily, and not feel compelled to do something--even if it means just crossing it out and doing something else in its place.

I also found that those things we keep putting off are usually the things we should have been doing in the first place. For instance, if you leave something out in the middle of the floor, like a tool, it just might help you get your task complete. It will serve as a simple reminder to motivate you to get what ever needs to be done immediately. I have personally done this with a vacuum, a carpet shampooer, and a pile of papers and receipts I needed to sort through. What tidy person wants to see that mess in the middle of the floor each day? So what are you most likely going to do? Make time to get those things done, so that you can put what you're keeping back in its proper place.

Sometimes we over-think things and don't get anything done! For example, there was one writing project I kept thinking about and did nothing, but when I left my notes by the computer and only devoted time to that (during my free time which I made time for) that day, it got done. No cell phone was answered, the children were watching movies and playing with toys (which I typically rotate so that they feel that excited feeling every time they see an old toy again.) Once everything else was done, I began typing.

The next day, I did the same thing all over again and then the next day and the next. I think when we think too much about what we have to do, we put pressure on ourselves and then we don't want to do them. Sometimes we just need to jump right in-- turn off the Internet, TV and other distractions and just do them!

When I realized how much time I was wasting during the day, doing routine activities, I found some tools to help make my life easier and free up more time in my busy day. Everything from a four-slice toaster to online programs to automate some of my routine tasks. I also freed myself of "traditions," that were taking far too much money out of my pocket and time away from my business activities. It wasn't necessary to make meals that require a lot of preparation-- especially daily. I stopped taking the children out so much; therefore I cut down spending money on more toys and games that just added to their collection of toy bins. I also took all those birthday wishes off my calendars. It just didn't make sense to spend money on people who don't think enough of you. I also cut off the people who just were no added benefit to my life. How much negativity can one stand? I think of an old song, "I can do bad all by myself, I don't need no help!"

My friends, this is what it takes to make time to accomplish a New Year's goal or two.

To God be all the glory.

Nicholl McGuire

Poetry: Steel City Under Watch by Nicholl McGuire

When I began really taking an interest in writing it started with a poem about nature back when I was nine years old. Funny, I developed an interest for journal writing at the same time, because I decided to pen it in my first diary.

It's usually a single word, a tugging in my spirit (or what some would call "your gut,") that makes me pen a poem. I don't restrict myself to a certain technique. If I feel like rhyming, then I rhyme, if I just want to write something that doesn't rhyme, isn't very long, and gets right to the point, then I do just that!

So the other day, I awoke to the following poem having been inspired by: the recent explosion of a rapper from Pittsburgh, PA (my hometown) called Wiz Khalifa as well as some interesting research about the music industry (I have been doing for almost two years now.) Here goes...the poem I title, Steel City Under Watch

The brotha from the Burg sitting back acting mellow
tellin' the whole d*mn world, "Black and yellow, black and yellow!"

But the truth be told,
the colors black and gold.

Is the brotha color blind,
what was on his mind?

Behind the scenes we know,
it's all about the show.

Red eyes high
while telling people a lie.

Another celebrity in season.
Fans gave good reason.

An illuminated state
lookin' for its mate.

What seeds did he sow?
Who does he know?

The bees be buzzin'
it seems about a dozen.

They are the called.
They are the chosen.

The industry creates.
The industry breaks.

Give somethin' up,
for that drink in your cup.

Worshiping gods
sparing the rods.

Hoping they will learn
while their parents' yearn
for another star
leaving God afar.

What will it take
for your eyes to be open?
A tragedy or death
seems to be the way of copin'.

Now that you know,
somethin' bout the show,
look around and you will see
that colors really matter to the one-eyed enemy.

Nicholl McGuire

Social Bookmarking

When it comes to keeping up with the many websites I visit, I utilize social bookmarking. One day while surfing the Internet and listening to an Internet guru, I came across an interesting site that helps with my social bookmarking. It is called, Only Wire.

This is a great site that not only helps you keep up with your many posts, but allows you to save all your login information to each website that you bookmark links. Simply put, you don't have to keep logging into your account every time you want to post a bookmark.

To visit the site just click here.

When it Comes to Business, Don't Text or Twitter Me!

"Did you get my text? I sent you a Twitter message...Did you check your Facebook?" Give me a break! People are getting ridiculous with this social media connection business! I don't want a simple text or twitter message about money someone owes me, I have a phone number too! I don't want my landlord sending me an email about fixing something in my apartment without a phone call. When it comes down to business, I believe one should always call to confirm. "Hello, I just wanted to let you know that the money is on the way. I apologize for my tardiness." or "Hi there, I know you are busy, but I will be in the neighborhood and just wanted to follow up to see if you received my email." Now how hard was that to call someone?

You see, some of us communicate back and fourth initially via email, text, etc. but at some point, one of us should be picking up the phone especially when there is a problem. Someone texts, "I don't like what you just said...call me." Texting and emailing about a serious issue can come across harsh. It is almost too easy to get an attitude about what someone says to you when there is no smile, no lol, no anything behind your statement.

Too many days might go by and you haven't heard from someone, it would seem to me that this person is either ignoring you, never received your message, or is still working on an issue. Wouldn't you want to hear a live voice by day three? What if something changed and he or she never bothered to update you on it ? I don't know about you, but my money and time are valuable!

It really gets under my skin when someone says, "I never got your message..." when you know they did while looking at your delivery receipt and confirmation that the email was opened. But that's what happens when you solely rely on texts and email. I understand how convenient a text or email can be, but I also know that a simple phone call to confirm that someone got a message is important.

So when it comes to business, I just might think twice about that person or business who chooses to send me a text; rather than, talk to me. Is the guy confident, sneaky, a liar or hiding something? Is this gal someone who will play the "I didn't get your message" game when there is a problem? hmmm.

On Writing Relationship Articles

I already did the screaming, took the abuse, cried about the lies, and got the divorce, so you didn't have to. I was shut out, ridiculed, falsely accused, and made a public spectacle of, so you wouldn't have to. I have been the sinner and the saint in my relationships. So do I have experience living, breathing, suffocating and dying in relationships, yes!

Did I ever dream that I would ever sit down and pen my relationship experiences in article form? No. Did I ever think that I would get married and have children some day as a child? No. All I ever wanted was a simple life—free of complications, and all I ever got was challenges to overcome—to sit back and analyze, create a solution, implement it, and watch for results. Welcome to a glimpse of my world and most likely your world too when it comes to intimate relationships.

Some of my articles have been painted with a broad stroke, yet there is a lot of detail when you examine closely. Sometimes the work applies to the reader and other times it doesn't. (I still can't understand why some people read work that has nothing to do with them and then will leave ignorant comments! But I digress.) Some of my readers, don't study any art regardless the form whether writing, painting, music, photography etc. so when I write, there are those that see the different art forms including the abstract ones. When they just don't get it and aren't interested in using their critical thinking skills, they will pick up the, “She's crazy, self righteous,” even a tad-bit strange stamp.

Relationships are like abstract art and some were never meant to resemble anything—they just are. They weren't meant to look like mom and dad's relationship, Suzie and Becky's friendship or every other person's family in the neighborhood. I can't explain everything about a certain relationship topic when I write, because sometimes some things aren't meant to be explained in detail, you just have to get out there and make things work for you!

When you read my work, sometimes you will sense my anger, detect my ignorance, witness my truth, but always read my experience with common sense. Some of the advice in my relationship articles is so easy to follow—a teen could do it. Some of my tips have already been done a million times before, but it doesn't mean that we shouldn't keep trying a million times more. I love the readers who say, “I did that already.” Well tweak an old idea, try something different, but do something; rather than, keep reading article after article until your eyes crisscross!

I wish I could please everyone, but we live in an imperfect world and there is no pleasing everyone! So as I grow older, I learned that it's best to walk away from the crowd who gathers around the water-cooler talking about everything that's wrong with someone or something and to avoid taking to heart the comments whether good or bad that say, “Thank you” a thousand times or “I hate you” a thousand more. I have a job to do.

Having a relationship with anyone can be complicated, but I am learning it all depends on the parties involved. If you want to sit around and find fault with a partner, relative or friendship about every little thing he or she does, then welcome complication. If you want to work with these people and find everything they are doing right, then welcome easy street. Bees are attracted to honey and so are people.

One of the worse relationships, besides an abusive one, is the one that you work real hard to do everything right and someone still finds fault with you. Rebounding becomes more and more difficult. First, you reason, “He's having a hard day...” Then you reason, “Well that time it was my fault.” Later, you're asking yourself, “Now how did I get back here again?” So you debate, you use the silent treatment tactic, you rally support from family and friends (being careful not to go into too much detail that will make you look worse than you already look,) and then we are back at square one again in the relationship. We are love-making, “I love you...” with a verbal or physical apology thrown around here and there.

I am learning the older you get, the less energy you have for fighting. It can be challenging having a relationship with someone years older (I have been there done that and still doing it,) because at any given moment this person can look at you and say, “I rather die than fight with you any longer, goodbye.” The energy to stay in the relationship is just not there like it once was and before long you are just sitting at home quiet and alone. Sometimes I wonder about those elderly people, abandoned by their families, I can only imagine the fighting they did in their younger years. It's a thought like this that triggers a memory, then an article and then another and before long I am delving in areas of my own life that people can relate.

I pray that you will find the peace you need from reading my relationship articles. I also hope that the critics will share their experiences too (without the fluff.) It's so easy to sit back and watch the traffic go by, but when it's time to drive in it, some people look for the side streets and back roads. The same holds true when it comes to relationships, there are those that rather not get on the long road toward a committed one, because they think it's just easier to take the short-cuts. But as some of us will tell you, those short-cuts often lead to more drama!

Nicholl McGuire
To read some of my work visit: Amazon Author Central

Over 30 Days Into the New Year Already!

Sometimes you lose track of time when you are having fun! Such was the case when I stopped by my blog and noticed I hadn't updated it in awhile. Lately, I have been very busy and only getting busier with each passing day!

I have been asked by friends when is my next book coming out, I can't help but respond, "Did you read the first one?" There are some nice people out there, don't get me wrong, but seriously when you are showing someone support especially a writer, you have to put your money where your mouth is! I have personally shelled out my share of cash to help those who can help me as well as people I don't know personally and who can't do one thing for me, but smile and say, "Thank you."

If there is one thing I am learning about article writing, pinging, blogging, social bookmarking, and video marketing it is you need time, time and more time in the beginning before you see one penny in your account.

The TV is often shut off, the children have learned how to entertain themselves while I work from home, and the phone is basically non-existent. I tell my family, "You want to spend the money then let me make the money." When you are on the fast track to build dreams, yes you do take the time to smell the roses every now and then, but when you are just getting started, the roses are going to wilt, baby! I will see them when they bloom again!

Stay blessed and have a happy New Year,

Nicholl