My Thoughts on Love this Valentine's Day

I thought of my book, "Laboring to Love Myself" and how appropriate to call attention to it to those who are starved of love this Valentine's Day.  Why does one feel so overwhelmed with just living? 

For I have learned, that one is void of love.  No love coming and no love going.  Repeated rejection over one's years produces no love for self or others.  "What do I care?  I care about no one?  No one cares about me..." says the loveless. 

No action produces no reaction.  If I show no love to others it isn't any wonder that I have not love.  If my love is not received, then it is my responsibility to find someone or group who will sincerely love me.  I hope that this Valentines Day you will reflect on what it truly means to love beyond a simple token of appreciation.

Nicholl McGuire author of Laboring to Love Myself

Nicholl is on Godtube

Godtube is a website that showcases Christian videos. At this site, you will find  Nicholl reading from book Laboring to Love Myself from virtualassistant on GodTube.

One Day at a Time: Laboring to Love Myself

The road in learning to love myself has not been an easy or short one. It has been difficult and long. I finally realized after 30 plus years on this planet that I had no concept of what love is and how do I incorporate it into my daily life. I had heard people tell me and those around them that they loved them. I had even told others that I loved them. But I came to understand that the warm feeling I had inside was like a lightswitch it cut on and off. How did I get beyond the temporal feelings and lean toward something more permanent? I would not find the answer to this question until I looked within and stopped focusing on man or woman’s definition of what love is.

In order to begin my journey toward loving self first, others and God, I had to understand what love was not. Love was not abusive, it didn’t tease, wasn’t manipulative or controlling. It didn’t walk around having an attitude and criticizing people. It wasn’t loud and obnoxious either. Love was kind, considerate, compassionate, giving, affectionate, and uplifted people. It wasn’t out to make war with everyone although some people accused love of doing that. Those who didn’t understand love nor ever received it were the people who were at war with love.

Did you ever find yourself suspecting someone of wanting something more just because they did something nice for you? Did you ever feel obligated to do something for someone just to get them off your back? Did you try to find fault with them? Did you debate with them just so that you could get out of doing something for them? I ask these questions, because people who don’t know genuine love will be suspicious of it. They will talk about it to others and hope they can rally up some support that says, “Down with love, up with knowledge.” The “I told-you-so” types want to be right that love wasn’t really love after all, “You see why I don’t put my heart out there…I like him but I don’t love him…I don’t feel the need to tell people I love them…” This kind of thinking is why many relationships fail, why many children grow up abusing their partners and their own children, it’s why people refuse to get along and so on.

If there is anything I want you to come away with today is watch for loving moments, loving statements and the opportunity to show others love. The sweet voice in your mind that says, “I should do this for Jane and John Doe…” shouldn’t be shut down. It should not be suffocated with comments like, “But what has John done for me lately and well you know how Jane can be!” The thought came to your mind for a reason, you might as well act on it and what is the worse that could possibly happen? Someone may reject the gift and if so, you can always take it back, no longer perform the service, or take your business elsewhere. You should never allow rejection to keep you from performing.

Nicholl McGuire excerpt from an upcoming podcast regarding my book, "Laboring to Love Myself" Amazon.com

Laboring to Love Myself: sequel to Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

I am thrilled! My book Laboring to Love Myself is on Amazon.com If you aren't familiar with my first book, Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate then you might be wondering what's the big deal? Years ago, I was a victim of dating/domestic violence with a man ten years older than me. He was very controlling and believed that I was the problem for everything that went wrong with him. He blamed all the women of his past including his own mother. The problem was he had severe mental issues that resulted from some very disturbing things that he witnessed and experienced as a child and young man. I wrote the Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate, because I felt burdened to tell young women why we shouldn't stay in a relationship with an abuser.

Emotional and physical abuse is all the same. The controlling individual promises the sun, moon and stars but in the end he is bitter, manipulative, and scary. Who wants a relationship with someone like that? I urge anyone who happens to view this page, encourage those you know or yourself that this will be the year you will get out of the relationship and stay out! For tips visit http://laboringtoloveanabusivemate.blogspot.com

Click on the link to my new book, Laboring to Love Myself

Sequel to Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate in the Works Laboring to Love Myself

Since the release of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate in 2007, some readers have asked how has the abuse affected me later in life? The sequel Laboring to Love Myself answers that question as well as others. Like the first book, this too is interactive and challenges you to think about your relationship not with others but with self.

The book will also be available on Amazon.com in winter 2010. To find practical advice about various issues related to abuse, please visit the blog, laboringtoloveanabusivemate.blogspot.com.