Strong Women Just Aren't Popular with Insecure Men

When you are a woman who stands for what she believes in and will not back down because someone has told you, "You shouldn't say that...watch your tone...you can scare a man a way acting like that" you are deemed a b*tch and if you raise your voice with tears in your eyes then you are called a crazy b*tch! Welcome to my world!

I write impactful articles and at times I don't come across as one who is "nice, sweet, and a beautiful person." When a person is agonizing over an issue, but aren't ready to let go and let God, they don't like a person such as me. They look for flaws in everything from my writing to my personality in order to shut what I am saying down! They will even go so far as threaten my life! The Internet world is comprised of many hypersensitive, stubborn, miserable people who want advice but when it isn't wrapped with a nice bow all the time, they reject the gift!

When you are a strong woman whether on or offline, and I am not talking about a sista with an attitude, but a woman who has boundaries and sees people for who they really are even when they don't want to share much about themselves, you are considered a threat! People don't like to be exposed and many are not transparent on or off the Internet! They work real hard to get you to believe in their lies from sales people to world renown ministers! They study you to find your weaknesses and when they realize they can't penetrate your emotions to get you to do what they want, then they don't like you! They will say you are "a trouble-maker," "crazy," "off your rocker" and other similar statements.

A man who doesn't like women especially hates a strong woman! An insecure man hates a strong woman. He is often worried that she will step out on him, because he isn't living up to the words that are coming out of his mouth. A macho man hates a strong woman because he doesn't want to risk being hen-pecked. There are many weak men who desire strong women as if they will complete them when they won't. If anything these type of men learn that strong women require them to work in many aspects of their lives, both personal and professional, and if he isn't the type that wants to make a change, he is off looking for a weak woman.

So if you are a strong woman reading this wondering why you just can't seem to keep a man consider the kind of men who are attracted to you. If you are a woman having troubling swaying the people at your workplace to do something you know is good for the company, consider this, you may have a long history of standing up for what's right and people may be growing weary with going along with your ideas no matter how great they are. Some people will not support you just because they are tired of you being right so often! Even a strong woman's own children can be a problem to her especially if they are just not convinced that their mother knows best!

So with all that said, I encourage both the strong women and men out there to not allow others to keep you from speaking truth, but at the same time be prayerful! Continue to read the wise words of the Bible if you are a believer and God bless!

Sometimes We Forget to Set Goals

I will be the first to admit that every project I get involved in I don't always set goals especially if it isn't long-term. I came across this great article, I thought I would share:

How to Set Your Goals - Step by Step

By Kristen Burgess

You know that goal setting is very important. It helps you stay focused, keeps your productive, and you feel great when you achieve your goals. But if you've never set goals, or if you've set a lot of goals and haven't achieved them, setting goals can seem really overwhelming.
It should not be hard to set goals. It does require thought and effort, but it's not hard. You may need to set aside several hours or even a whole day to think about things and start solidifying some goals.
Start when you have some time to think. It's good to begin by thinking about where you are in your life. This isn't really the time to think about your regrets and mistakes - or where you could have been if you hadn't made those mistakes. This is the time to think just about where you are now. It's a time to "take stock of the situation."
Now that you've considered your situation, think about how you'd like to change that. Where would you like to be in your life next year? How about five years from now? What about ten years from now? Just brainstorm some things you'd like to have. What kind of money do you want to be making? What kind of job do you want? Would you like to travel somewhere in that time? What is your home or family like?
Just write several of your goals down now. It's good to include some short term ones and some long term ones. You can include concrete goals like "I want to live in a four bedroom home in my favorite neighborhood." You may also want to include some like "I am a happy person" which are not quite so concrete.
Now pick out a few goals that you really want to focus on. If you're unsure about things you can just start with a few. Do pick some that are more short term along with a long term one or two.
It's time to plan out your goals. Look at your goal and "work backwards." Think about what will need to happen for you to achieve that goal. I recommend you think about three months, or ninety days in the future. Where do you need to be, three months from now, to be on-target for that goal?
What knowledge will you need to have? What steps will you need to have taken? Write these things down under your goal. Now think about what it will take to get to that point? Make a list of actionable steps. "Actionable" means it's something you can actually do that will get you one step closer to your goal.
It's OK if these steps are "easy" in the beginning. They may involve simple research. For instance, if you want to own a four bedroom home within the next two years, you may start your goal planning by listing "research how mortgages work" as an action step.
This "information gathering stage" is often a first step for goals, and it's a good thing to start with. It gives you a pretty easy way to cross something off your list as "accomplished" and know that you're making real progress.
There will be steps beyond research, however. You may know what they are right away. Sometimes you'll need to do your research and knowledge gathering before you know what you need to do next. That's OK too. Just come back to your goal sheet when you've finished your research.
Reviewing your goals every four weeks or so is a good idea. Breaking them into 4-week chunks of action steps makes it easy to accomplish your steps and stick with your goal. It also allows you to modify your plan as you work through it and learn things you didn't know about before.
Sit down and think about your goals, then develop your action steps. These steps will be the plan that takes you from where you are now to where you'd like to be - one leap forward at a time.

Who Am I? Writer and Mother Nicholl McGuire Introduces Herself & Online Business
Sometimes readers want to know a little more about the person behind the scenes who is writing the material that they read. I am taking this opportunity to share a little bit about me and what I do. Enjoy! http://nichollmcguire.blogspot.com
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Nicholl McGuire's Contributor Profile - Associated Content

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Bit by the Acting Bug - Again!

Every now and then there is this little bug that bites me. Once his venom flows through my blood I have a sudden desire to want to act. Okay so I exaggerate a tad, but the truth is that around this time of year I get in the mood to act. Knowing full well I hate the fear that grows in my belly every time I do it and the many eyeballs that look at me when I do it, yet I still desire it anyway.

Its been almost eight years now since I have stood before a live audience. These days I perform behind the scenes. I read copy for websites, record my poetry online, and stage performances using my children around the house. I guess these things will suffice for now. However, I picture myself in the future doing something around the community like this older woman I met once. We performed in a play together. She was such an inspiration and I fed off her energy. She took acting seriously and when I asked her why she did it, she said, "It gets me out the house. It makes me feel young and despite what my husband and children say about it, I enjoy doing it and I am going to keep on doing it!"

We make a lot of sacrifices in this life for others especially when you are a parent, so when the opportunity comes to do something for you, just do it!

I'll be acting again one day, I can feel it...

Nicholl McGuire

http://www.youtube.com/nmenterprise7

One Day at a Time: Laboring to Love Myself

The road in learning to love myself has not been an easy or short one. It has been difficult and long. I finally realized after 30 plus years on this planet that I had no concept of what love is and how do I incorporate it into my daily life. I had heard people tell me and those around them that they loved them. I had even told others that I loved them. But I came to understand that the warm feeling I had inside was like a lightswitch it cut on and off. How did I get beyond the temporal feelings and lean toward something more permanent? I would not find the answer to this question until I looked within and stopped focusing on man or woman’s definition of what love is.

In order to begin my journey toward loving self first, others and God, I had to understand what love was not. Love was not abusive, it didn’t tease, wasn’t manipulative or controlling. It didn’t walk around having an attitude and criticizing people. It wasn’t loud and obnoxious either. Love was kind, considerate, compassionate, giving, affectionate, and uplifted people. It wasn’t out to make war with everyone although some people accused love of doing that. Those who didn’t understand love nor ever received it were the people who were at war with love.

Did you ever find yourself suspecting someone of wanting something more just because they did something nice for you? Did you ever feel obligated to do something for someone just to get them off your back? Did you try to find fault with them? Did you debate with them just so that you could get out of doing something for them? I ask these questions, because people who don’t know genuine love will be suspicious of it. They will talk about it to others and hope they can rally up some support that says, “Down with love, up with knowledge.” The “I told-you-so” types want to be right that love wasn’t really love after all, “You see why I don’t put my heart out there…I like him but I don’t love him…I don’t feel the need to tell people I love them…” This kind of thinking is why many relationships fail, why many children grow up abusing their partners and their own children, it’s why people refuse to get along and so on.

If there is anything I want you to come away with today is watch for loving moments, loving statements and the opportunity to show others love. The sweet voice in your mind that says, “I should do this for Jane and John Doe…” shouldn’t be shut down. It should not be suffocated with comments like, “But what has John done for me lately and well you know how Jane can be!” The thought came to your mind for a reason, you might as well act on it and what is the worse that could possibly happen? Someone may reject the gift and if so, you can always take it back, no longer perform the service, or take your business elsewhere. You should never allow rejection to keep you from performing.

Nicholl McGuire excerpt from an upcoming podcast regarding my book, "Laboring to Love Myself" Amazon.com

My Own Woman

There comes a point in life where like a child learning how to walk, you start out being helped by others in learning how to make decisions, but then eventually you learn how to think for yourself. No longer do you succumb to what other people say, think, or feel about you. You are your own woman or man now, and if society doesn't like it well then they can...

I awoke one morning to this reality of being my own woman. I reflected back to childhood memories both good and bad. I primarily pondered on those who have influenced my life, in particular the United States government, from the public education I received to the public food stamps I once carried, it all seemed good at least on the surface, but remember what I wrote earlier, "I awoke one morning..."

Having been indoctrinated very young by an organization (I prefer not to name because they do more good than harm for young minds,) they taught me to love God, country and family, I didn't know about soft mind control tactics at the time. I didn't know they were being used on me and others who chose to join government-run organizations including churches (forget what you heard about separation of church and state.) Rather, I thought I was born into a nation that allowed us to exercise our God-given abilities not to control them for their benefit. However, the reality was society, not God, had a plan for my life, if I didn't know how to have a relationship with my Creator for myself.

Others would tell me how to talk, walk, what to say, what to think, etc. Of course it was all for my own good, now wasn't it? Is there ever a time limit when we outgrow soft mind control? Apparently there wasn't for me or for you, because even after you have graduated from highschool, college, and/or trade school, there are organizations that are government controlled as well waiting on you. Whether it is the mega church not too far from your home, the local chapter run by a national group, a business, the children youth center, even the community childcare facility, someone or a group is influencing you and your family in a way to do something for them and whatever that something is it has a dollar figure behind it! Military recruits study your son, entertainment groups study your daughter and civic groups study you. If you do well and stand out above everyone else, someone will want to learn more of you. That someone will be your handler one day if you aren't too careful.

So I have a new way of thinking similar to those older people who come to a place in their life where they say, "I don't care." They take that deep breath and they enjoy their lives and then they die. I personally am tired of holding my breath in and waiting for others to tell me what to do, I realize its time to be my own woman!

Whether your "handlers" were your parents, your friends, civic groups and other associations, someone influenced you to become the person who stares back at you in the mirror. Be it right, be it wrong you are manufactured in some way by someone else to work for them. I had a serious wake up call upon my life after 911. I had never thought for a single minute that our government had anything to do with the catastrophes that occurred that day, but I was wrong!

The images on the millions of television screens on 911 were so horrific. I learned later those closed eyes of mine who had been glued to the television, had went to bed that afternoon and didn't wake up until that evening with two little ones playing alone. I had experienced what some would call a "trauma based mind control" like so many others. I saw the unedited version of the tragedy live. People were literally throwing their bodies from the windows of the Twin Tower buildings. By the time some of you got off of work to see the events that evening, they had edited those disturbing images out of the reporting.

Whether we choose to admit or not, we have all been open to mind control at some time or another in our lives. If you have been trained in anything whether how to fight in a war or how to perform tasks for a boss in a professional atmosphere, someone has programmed you on what to do each and every day. With routine, you eventually know what to say, how to say it, where to put something, what to do, etc. This is why sometimes it is very hard for some to teach an outsider, because they are so controlled by their atmosphere they see no other way of doing things. Then when the new- comer shows up with a new way of doing things that could help the company, he or she is greeted with a frown.

There are two certain types of men I have been around all my life, the ones who have been in the military and the ones who have been in prison. Both types of men have come out of these government-run organizations with no support, no deprogramming, and no understanding of how their actions have negatively impacted others. Trained to kill, a man who doesn't know how to turn off that personality is a terror. He uses the same mind control tactics he was given on his family. He has to control every situation. He treats everything like he is on a mission and if you fail him, there is a price to pay. He knows how to use his voice to get what he wants (or at least tries to get what he wants.) He stands a certain way to demand attention. He fights in such a way to send a message to one's mind that will be etched forever. He has to maintain an atmosphere that is conducive to his programming. Instead of doing push ups or running laps like he did when he failed his instructor, you are threatened, possibly beaten, strangled, something is taken from you, or he simply walks away from you and all ties associated with you.

The man who has been trained to follow orders in jail comes out into the world looking for someone or something to make him feel whole again. Usually when his needs aren't met, he returns to his old way of life even worse then when he left. Without family, church, or other kinds of positive support, he is nothing more than a walking time bomb too just like the brainwashed former military official. At some point he is going to explode on someone or something. Unfortunately, I didn't witness many good men who were great to be around having come from either background. If anything, they were problems to either their own family, friends, community, or society at large. The military got a few good men, but once those men came out, what happened? In my personal experience I have yet to encounter men who came out with minds completely intact especially if they fought in a war and/or been exposed to certain drugs designed "to aid them" while on duty. Something always seems to be mentally amiss.

So here I am wide awake one morning reflecting on my life and specifically thinking about having been influenced by government entities from public school to jobs. I even recalled a time when I had thought about joining the Army or Marines. I had been influenced very young to take pride in my country and as a young woman at 17 years, I was willing to do just that until my dad told me otherwise.

When I awoke that morning I was sad, then angry, then sad again because I knew my reality, my truth, yet those around me were still in the dark. And as I learned from my own experience, you can't be of any help to someone when you are living in the dark.

Nicholl McGuire
http://www.associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire

So What About Your Books?

You know those books you are probably thinking about writing or the ones you have already written but haven't done anything with recently? Well, I have a couple of those too and these days my time is very limited as well as patience and motivation. I'm just not much of a politician doing alot of handshaking, especially with little ones, household chores, an Internet business, books, and more! However, it doesn't keep me from finding alternative ways to promote my books. So I came across this article. I thought maybe someone, just like me, might need a helping hand too with getting those books and/or business promoted. Enjoy!

How to Build Your Author Platform to Enhance Your Book Promotion

By Dana Lynn Smith

As a book author, you've probably seen the term author platform used a lot, but you may be wondering: what is a platform and how do I get one?

Your author platform determines your reach in the market and it's a valuable tool in your book promotion activities. If you're hoping to land a book deal with a traditional commercial publisher, a strong author platform is critical. When publishers evaluate book proposals, they want an idea of how well known you are and how successful you will be at promoting your book once it's published.

The best time to start building your author platform is before you write your book or book proposal, because it takes time to build your platform. But regardless of where you are in your publishing journey, you can continue to strengthen your author platform.

I've seen lots of definitions for author platform, but it basically boils down to three things:

o Brand
o Reputation
o Connections

Branding

Branding helps you stand out in a crowded marketplace and makes you memorable. One of the most important parts of your brand is your author tagline - a concise and catchy description of what you do. Here are some examples of author taglines:

o The Publicity Hound
o The Love Doctor
o The Productivity Pro
o The Risque Romance Writer
o Author of thrilling mysteries
o Author of the Detective McGee series
o Writer of educational children's books

Use your tagline after your name in your promotional materials and signature, like a title. For example, I refer to myself as Dana Lynn Smith, The Savvy Book Marketer.

Your author photo is another important branding tool. Be sure to get a professional looking photo and use it everywhere, to build recognition of you. Professional doesn't necessarily mean a studio portrait - think about how the background, pose and clothing in your author photo can be a reflection of your brand and the type of books you write. Wherever your photo appears, list both your name and tagline as a caption beneath the photo.

Author branding can also include your logo, book covers, the color scheme you use, your distinctive style of writing or speaking, and your academic qualifications. All of these elements together constitute a recognizable brand that makes you makes you memorable and builds credibility as part of your author platform.

Take a look at your own branding and think about what you can do to strengthen it.

Reputation

The reputation component of your author platform is a measure of how well known you are, what you are known for, and how credible you are. Consider these factors in your book promotion:

o Do you have a degree, special training or extensive experience in the topic that you're writing about and/or in the craft of writing?
o Do you have (or can you obtain) a professional certification in your area of expertise?
o What awards or other recognition have you received?
o What kind of media experience do you have?
o How many people do you reach each month through speaking or interviews?
o How many people read your blog?
o How many articles have you written and posted or published in the past month?
o How well known are you and how much name recognition do you have?
o What leadership positions do you hold?
o Why should people listen to you or read your books?

Nonfiction authors can gain a reputation as an expert in their topic through such activities as writing books and articles, speaking and teaching, appearing on talk shows, being quoted in other people's articles, and writing the foreword for other books.

Fiction authors may become known for their writing style and their expertise in writing in a specific genre (such as children's, sci-fi, romance, or mystery) or for their niche within a particular genre (vampire stories, romantic adventure).

Your reputation and author platform can be enhanced by winning awards, receiving excellent book reviews, and getting testimonials and endorsements from celebrities and experts in your field.

What can you do to boost your author reputation and expert status and increase the number of people you reach in your book promotion activities? How can you highlight your credentials in your marketing materials?

Connections

When promoting a book, it's not just what you know, it's who you know!

To sell books in today's marketplace, you need to be connected. Here are some examples of the type of connections that are valuable to authors book promotion:

Contact Database - Clients, prospects, colleagues, friends, and family.

Opt-in Mailing List - People who have given you permission to contact them.

Influencers - Celebrities, well-known people in your field, book reviewers, media, and bloggers.

Online Networks - Connections on Facebook, Twitter and other online networks, groups and forums.

Blog Readers - People who read your blog or subscribe to the blog's feed.

Professional Associations - Fellow association members and leaders. Serving in a leadership position enhances your visibility within the organization.

Other Groups - Alumni associations, civic and service organizations, hobby clubs, etc.

What can you do to increase your connections and leverage the connections that you have? How can you partner with others to extend your reach in your book promotion?

Dana Lynn Smith is a book promotion coach and author of several book promotion guides, including The Savvy Book Marketer's Guide to Successful Social Marketing. For more tips, follow @BookMarketer on Twitter, visit Dana's book promotion blog and get a free copy of the Top Book Marketing Tips ebook when you sign up for her complimentary book promotion newsletter. After reading this article, I thought about what I do already online and who I already know. These days my audience is primarily online so whenever I am conversing with people via the Internet, I always include my latest project and invite them to my web page. For example, my latest project involves a family history/personal experience book about the relatives on my dad's side of the family, so whenever I communicate via the web, I let those who I know will be impacted about it. I also post updates on my personal web page linked to my email when I think about it. When I am offline, I mention it to anyone I am talking to via phone and I follow up with snail mail. Although there is alot of talk about the Internet, I am very much a traditionalist and still enjoy snail mail, fliers, classified ads, and other offline activities to market. - Nicholl McGuire

"I want a blog!"

They saw your blog and now they want one too, the "I want..." people I like to call them. Its not like they are serious about wanting a blog, they just desire one because you have one. They don't even know what they will talk about, but because you talk about yours or you have your website link so neatly placed on a business card, flier or somewhere else, it has caught the person's eye and now they want it too.

These are the same "I want..." people who say, "I want to write a book too!" when you tell them about yours hoping they will buy it. Instead, they ask about the content of your book then politely interrupt with, "My relative just wrote a book...my friend had a book signing at XYZ bookstore." I don't want to appear rude, desperate for a book sale, or mean so I say, "Oh that's nice..." But what I really want to say is "Who cares just buy my book already! Better yet, I'll make it easy for you, here's my book now tell your relative or friend about it and have them call me." LOL

Why can't others just be happy for you and buy your book? Anyway, I digress...

So what I really wanted to say in this blog posting is I found the following article helpful for that friend who says, "Ah, I want a blog too!" and if you don't have a friend like that great, maybe it will be helpful for you!

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4 Methods To Increase Blog Visitors

Blogging is a perfect way for people to share their thoughts with others. When people blog, it signifies they keep an updated online journal or calendar. Weblog and blog are identical things. Companies might also blog to help increase the number of business on their websites. For many bloggers, going up traffic to their blogs is not the only objective. Most people that blog need to keep their visitors coming back for more.

The next are four alternatives to keep visitors coming to your blog site.

Blogging is a relatively new phenomenon. A few blog writers select to keep their blogs personal and do not share their thoughts with others. These are more like online diaries. Other wants to share with everyone what he or she has to tell. Blogging is a huge business and multiple websites offer free blog hosting. Furthermore, many companies elect blogging as an inexpensive alternative to advertise their products or services. Blogging on the net is often much cheaper than maintaining a website and is normally more attractive for readers and customers.

1. Update your blog

The easiest alternative to keep visitors coming back to your blog site is to update your blog on a regular basis. Readers will stay loyal to blogs that are updating daily. A few blog writers even updated many times a day. Readers will tend to lose interest in your writing if they have to wait many days for new material. Be loyal to your readers and your readers will be loyal to your blog. Furthermore, there are entirely thousands of blogs accessible on the Internet. If your blog is not update on a regular basis, you will lose your readers to another blog site. Another fun alternative to update your blog and keep your readers interested in your site is to include something fun for your readers to enjoy. That may be as easy as a joke or perhaps a link to a humorous story you have found on the net. You might also try this includes a trivia game or polls for your readers to enjoy on a regular basis.

2. Participate in web communities

Participating in web communities or debate forums and remarking your blog whenever probable will help keep readers coming back to your site. Furthermore, you can gain new readers every time doing this. You can also be loyal to the blogs of other writers and ask them to arrive to your site. Leave cool comments about their site and invite them to your site. If you have mutual interests and an identical type of readers, you can even share your blog links on your site. This helps everyone. Your reader will appreciate attractive reading while you make the most of readers from the other site.

3. Understand who reads your blogs

Another great alternative to keep blog readers coming back for more is to comprehend who reads your blog and write content that is direct towards them. This does not mean that you have to write on only one particular subject. If you are a stay at home mom and write about your life at home with the kids, your loyal readers may not appreciate it if you write about innovative topics or use loads of foul language in your writing. If you mostly write humor, do not bog your readers down with sorrowful woes and tales. Your readers will be interested in the things that attracted them to your site in the first place. That is normally what you are more interested in writing about. You can gain a better understanding of your readers interested by this includes places for comments and encouraging your readers to contact you by email.

4. Include keywords

You can gain readership and help keep your ongoing readers by this includes certain keywords in your blog. If you have entered your blog on a search engine, the keywords that refer to your blog will come up after a search. This is a great alternative to get readers interested in your blog. This is also a good way for companies to boost the traffic to their blog.

Blogging is the new alternative to keep a calendar or journal online. Blogging is increasingly generalizing for companies further. If what you want is to make your blog stand out against the thousands of other blogs, keep your readers interested and coming back for more everyday by updating your writing, take part in online communities, comprehend your readers and include keywords.

By: Calvin Tan